Just Put Your Foot On The Damn Gas Pedal!

I have a proposal for a scientific study that I think would be welcomed by a vast majority of the motoring public. The subjects of the study would be the bewildered idiots who have managed to obtain a driver’s license. The purpose of the study would be to determine, and hopefully repair, the malfunctions in their brain synapses and neuromuscular pathways that cause the interminable 5 second delay between the time they see a green light and the time they put their feet on the damn gas pedal.